Learn why your baby latches and unlatches, what a good latch looks like, and how to fix latch issues fast.

Early on in breastfeeding infants can latch and unlatch for a variety of reasons and not all of them mean something isn’t working, but sometimes this is a sign that you need to look deeper to help your baby latch more successfully.  Let’s dig in to find out why babies do this and what you can do to help!

Check out my free guide to baby-led latching, here.

Why Babies Unlatch

Baby Reflexes While Learning to Latch

Latching is a skill that requires practice and patience, full stop. Your baby may go about this in a way that seems counterintuitive, but for them, it is how they are getting oriented to the breast.

Infants are exploring their new environment and practicing their reflexes. Learning to latch on takes practice to master! Infants are hardwired to practice these reflexes until it is second nature. if your infant is just hours to days old and is exhibiting this behavior but is content and happy go ahead and let them practice. These reflexes include….

• Rooting reflex: The baby will turn their head and open their mouth when their cheek is stroked or touched.
• Suck reflex: When something touches the roof of the baby's mouth, they will start to suck.
• Swallowing reflex: As the baby sucks, they will also automatically swallow the milk.
• Tongue thrust reflex: This is the baby's natural instinct to push their tongue forward when anything touches their lips, which helps prevent choking and ensures they can effectively latch onto the nipple.

It's important to note that these reflexes can vary from baby to baby and may become less prominent or disappear altogether as your baby grows and becomes more skilled at feeding.

Is Gas Causing Your Baby to Pop Off the Breast?

Gas! Many times when babies get going and then squirm and pop off the breast a burp might be lurking. Lift them off the breast and try some burping positions to help move that air bubble along. You can also try some bicycle kicks with their legs and a gentle belly massage to get the bubbles movin’. Visits with a chiropractor can also help with bowel movements for your baby to be more comfortable. 

It is worth noting that a good latch can help cut down on the amount of air a baby is taking in during feeding. Continually popping on and on and losing suction can contribute to your baby taking in more air during feeding. Check out my blog on latching, here.

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Here is a quick demo of my favorite burping technique:

Common Latching Challenges (and How to Fix Them)

Unlatching repeatedly and fussing at the breast can be a sign that it is time to look at how baby is positioned at the breast.

🛑 Problem: Baby’s Chin Is Tucked = Shallow Latch

Using a cradle position that pushes your baby’s chin toward their chest can lead to a shallow latch—and a whole lot of nipple pain.

✅ Fix:
Lean back. Like really lean back—think “9 months pregnant, watching Netflix on the couch” vibes.
Position your baby so that if you removed your hands, they’d still be resting securely on your body. This laid-back approach helps them feel stable, encourages a deeper latch, and lets gravity work in your favor.

📚 Want more positioning tips? Check out my full blog post on latching here.

🛑 Problem: Baby Has a Head-Turning Preference

Some babies struggle to latch well on one side due to in-utero positioning or tension in the neck and shoulders. You might notice them preferring one breast or only turning their head in one direction.

✅ Fix:
Try latching baby on the less-preferred breast in the exact same position they use on their “favorite” side. This often helps with orientation and comfort.

Also consider visiting a craniosacral therapist or pediatric chiropractor. Addressing body tension can make a huge difference in your baby’s ability to use their full range of motion—and feed more comfortably.

• Want more positioning tips? Check out my full blog post on latching here.

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Why Reclined Breastfeeding Actually Works

Yes—reclined breastfeeding is absolutely safe for newborns. In fact, it’s often a game-changer for latch and comfort. Think of it as breastfeeding with training wheels: your baby gets the positional stability they need, and you get a deeper, more comfortable latch with way less stress on your body.

Inside Boob School, you’ll get full access to my Latched AF workshop, where I walk you through exactly how to use reclined breastfeeding to fix common latch issues (including shallow latch, nipple pain, and tension in your baby’s body).

You can also get started with some of my best tips in the free Latching Guide right here

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Calm Your Baby with Hand Expression 

If the newborn keeps unlatching and crying it is a good time to try hand expression and spoon feeding. Check out my blog on hand expression, here. This simple tool can help “reset” babies to get their tongue forward and help them feel more settled before trying again. Place infant skin to skin, both of you take a deep breath and try again.

In Boob School, we have an entire masterclass on hand expression and exactly how to master this skill so you can use it to support your milk supply and help with early breastfeeding challenges. 

You can also get started with some of my best tips in the free Latching Guide right here

Overactive let down aka fast let down

Overactive letdown—sometimes called fast letdown—is when your milk flows so quickly that your baby struggles to keep up. It’s not a supply issue, but a flow issue. And while it can feel overwhelming, there are ways to manage it.

Here are some common signs you might have an overactive letdown:

Baby Behavior:

• Choking, coughing, or sputtering at the breast
• Pulling off repeatedly, crying, or arching in frustration
• Clicking sounds during feeding (as they try to manage the flow)
• Refusal to latch or short, frantic feeding sessions

Parent Challenges:

• Leaking or spraying milk during letdown
• Engorgement, especially if baby doesn’t fully drain the breast
• Feeling like you’re drowning them every time they latch (ugh, been there)

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Tips for navigating an overactive letdown

f your baby is sputtering, choking, or popping off the breast, these simple adjustments can help make feeds calmer and more comfortable—for both of you.

🛋️ 1. Try a Deeply Laid-Back Position

Let gravity work with you. Nursing while reclined (we’re talking nearly flat on the couch or bed) slows the milk flow, gives your baby more control, and helps them stay latched without stress.
👉 Need a visual? Check out this blog for latch position tips.

🍼 2. Nurse on One Breast Per Feeding

Offering just one breast at a time gives your baby a chance to fully empty the breast and keeps letdown from becoming overwhelming. It can also help balance your supply if you’re feeling overly full.

💨 3. Pause and Burp Mid-Feed

Stop partway through the feed to gently burp your baby. This gives them a break, releases swallowed air, and can help reset their latch before continuing.

🔁 4. Fully Drain One Breast Before Switching

If you do offer both breasts, wait until your baby finishes and detaches naturally before switching sides. Rushing the switch can lead to overfeeding, extra gas, and—you guessed it—more spit-up.

Here is a video of a mama I worked with who has a very strong letdown. We worked together to improve the baby's suck and ability to manage the letdown and also to recline deeply to help slow the flow of milk. 

🍼 What’s Actually Normal for Breastfed Babies?

Here’s the thing: you’re not supposed to know exactly how much milk your baby gets at every feed. You don’t have built-in ounce counters—and that’s okay. The goal isn’t perfection; it’s patterns.

What does help? Knowing the signs that your baby is getting enough, without needing to weigh them after every feed or obsess over output.

Let’s break it down:

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Let’s break down the overall signs of adequate infant intake.

Pees and Poops

• Day 1 of life you can expect on average, 1 pee and 1 poop.
• Day 2 of life…3 pees and 2 poops.
• Day 3 of life…4 pees and 2 poops.
• Day 4 of life…5 pees and 3 poops.
• Day 5 of life…6 pees and 4 poops.
• After the first five days, the normal number of wet and poopy diapers (6+ wet, 3-4 poopy diapers in a 24/hr period).

Over the first few days of life, your baby’s poop will also change in color and turn from meconium to yellow breast milk poop. 

How Long Should My Baby Be at the Breast?

Here’s the truth: there’s no magic number of minutes. Instead of timing every feed, focus on your baby’s cues, output, and overall behavior.

Yes, most babies feed 8–12 times per 24 hours—but every feed won’t look the same, and that’s okay.

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🔍 What Matters More Than Minutes

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🧘 Signs Your Baby Is Full:

• Body is relaxed and floppy after the feed
• Hands that were clenched at the start of the feed are now open and loose
• Baby unlatches on their own and doesn’t seem frantic or distressed
• They may fall asleep or just seem “milk drunk” 😴🥛

👶 Remember:

Some babies are efficient eaters and finish in 5–10 minutes. Others take their sweet time.
The quality of the feed matters more than the length.

Need help decoding your baby’s cues or figuring out if they’re getting enough? That’s exactly what we walk through in Boob School—with videos, guides, and real-time support.

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🚩 When to Ask for Help With Latching

If your baby:

• Can’t stay latched for more than 5–6 sucks without falling off or getting frustrated
• Or is nursing for longer than 30–40 minutes per feed with little satisfaction...

It’s time to reach out for support. These can be signs that baby isn’t transferring milk effectively or that something about latch, positioning, or oral function needs a closer look.

If you want to book an appointment with an IBCLC on our team, click here.

Even for the seasoned mama who has breastfed in the past, each new baby is a new breastfeeding relationship and it will take time for you to get the best latch that you can in each feeding session. There are many techniques that can be used to help you and your baby rock that latch, but the most important thing that I tell mamas over and over is to try your best to be patient and not feel overwhelmed at the moment. 

At times, hello 2 a.m. feeding from hell, this is easier said than done. It is okay to step away for a moment and leave your baby with another caregiver or safely in their crib if you need a reset. Remember your feeding journey may look less like a straight line and more like a winding road. Keep on keeping on, mama. You’ve got this! 

💡 Want more help with latching?

Inside Boob School, you’ll get the knowledge, support, and real-life tools to make feeding feel less like chaos—and more like something you can actually handle.

Short videos you can watch in your messy bun, real-time support when you’re in the thick of it, and zero judgment—just expert guidance from someone who gets it.

Whether you’re struggling with latch, feeling overwhelmed, or just want to stop Googling at 2 a.m., Boob School’s got your back.

👉 Join Boob School today and let’s get you the support you deserve.

Cheering you on, always 💛

XOXO,
Kelly
Founder & IBCLC behind Boob School

✨ Let’s stay connected:
❤️ Subscribe to my weekly breastfeeding tips
🎓 Explore Boob School + classes
🤱 Book a one-on-one consult

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